Pherolaggia by Tony-B

Pherolaggia (pronounced, “Fair-oh-laj-ee-ah”) is defined as an addiction to sexual pheromones.

In layman’s terms, it refers to the smelling or sniffing of underwear, usually that of the opposite sex.

When I was a kid, I actually did smell a girls bicycle seat on a dare, which led to a life-long addiction to smelling women and their panties – especially their dirty panties. Dirty panties and leather! Otherwise, I’m a “normal” human boy. Well, man, really. So let me tell you MY story…..

Like all boys my age, I became curious about girls as I entered puberty. Another boy that I knew from school, said that girls had a bad odor between their legs, and he bet me a comic book that I couldn’t smell a girl’s bicycle seat for a full minute, without stopping.

I won! But from that day on, I was hooked on pheromones. Pheromones are chemicals created by all animal species as a sexual attractant for mating. Boys have them, girls have them, every living thing, has them. In girls, the odor is produced in the genitals, and exists as the normal wetness between her legs. It’s a combination of her body sweat, her urine smell, and even anything that’s left in her panties when she farts.

One of the great secrets that women keep from men, is that whenever they go to the bathroom, afterward, they wash their genital area, usually with soap and water, in order to clean the area, and remove the smell. When it’s not possible to clean themselves as often as they should, they use perfume to cover them up.

Think of the times that women leave the dinner table to “freshen up”. They mean that literally! Women just naturally smell!

It’s not really a BAD smell; it’s just a smell that’s different from any other. And most girls don’t smell the same. I can’t say they’re all different, but I can say that there are a lot of differences, depending on their personal hygiene, as well as their choice of colognes or perfumes. But I do have to agree that eating pussy is an acquired taste.

As far as the taste of a clean pussy, there’s nothing like it.

By the time I reached my twenty-first birthday, I had a fine collection of panties I had wheedled, cajoled, begged or stolen from all the girls I had dated, or had a relationship with while I was growing up.

It was more than a hundred pair, all neatly folded, labeled in plastic bags, hidden in the ceiling crawl space in my parent’s house. They never knew they were there, but some of the girls did. They knew I was a collector, and in fact, frequently added to my collection.

I particularly liked wet panties, taken off the girl by myself, where I could get a good look at the location, and perhaps steal a kiss, or a lick, if the girl was willing. I could almost always talk her out of her panties, but it was often more difficult to get them to actually allow me to taste them. There were a couple of girls that I dated regularly, who allowed me to service them with my face and tongue frequently as we grew up.

In a plastic baggie, a pair of wet panties would last a long time, as the aroma of urine and other juices lingered on the fabric.

Looking back on it now, there is nothing better than the taste of a wet cunt pressed against my face. Yes, I’m a pussy eater….. A cunt licker….. A twat jockey….. And a piece of toilet paper! I have one woman who visits me regularly to use my toilet. - I’m the toilet.

Well, not in a dirty way….. What I mean is that we go into the bathroom, where I raise her dress or skirt, pull down her pants, then kneel in front of the toilet while she pees. My face is only inches away from her twat as I watch the urine flow out of her body. Afterward, she puts her foot up on the sink, and I lick her pussy clean for her.

God, I get hard, just thinking about it.

But back to the bicycle seat….. My first experience at the seat was a narrow leather seat, the kind on racing bicycles. Not like the flat ones that most girls ride, one that holds up a girl’s entire fanny, but the kind that just fits between her legs, and presses against her cunt. I’ve always thought that would be the most efficient kind for a girl, because it would give her pleasure from riding it while her legs swung freely as she pumped the pedals. I figured the flat seat would hold her up, but it was a lot like sitting on a stool; it would hold you up, but not give you any pleasure from the ride.

It was only later that I really learned that sexual excitement was part of a girl’s experience from riding the bicycle. You can bet, three to one, that girl’s who like to go “riding”, are enjoying the ride!

I became an expert of sorts, on proper setting of bicycle seats. I mean, like I helped the girls out by setting the proper height for their seat, recommending the proper width (always a racing seat), and convincing them that they should be getting pleasure from their seat.

I also cleaned their seats for them, and waxed them regularly, as a way of getting my hands – and my nose – close to the leather.

I especially liked one girl….. She was German, and liked to cycle wearing her native German costume, leiderhosen….. Short leather cut-offs, which revealed her bare legs. As she leaned forward over the handlebars, her breasts hung down, which appealed to me greatly. I fantasized about her for years, thinking about her breasts swaying in the open air from side to side as she rode, like a cow’s udders. But I never did get a pair of her panties.

Now that I’m getting older, I’m finding fewer and fewer women actually ride bicycles. There are some, but not many.

There is a small faction who ride horses regularly. My theory there, is they like to have to have a living, breathing thing between their legs, and holding them apart while they ride. I often woner how many of them achieve orgasm that way…..

Of course the problem with a horse, is that it has to be fed and cared for, and you have to clean up after them regularly. You’d be surprised how much manure a horse can produce on a regular basis, and they do it every day!

I wonder about Biker Chicks….. Do they get a thrill from having a hot engine between their legs, throbbing away to the accompaniment of the sound from the exhaust? Is the vibration from the wheels on the road the same as that from a vibrator in the hand?

Do transsexuals really get the same pleasure from sex as genetic women?

Is the Earth flat?

Are we really just creatures of habit, rooting around in the dust; are we just DNA’s way of reproducing itself like a virus? Or are we as useless as tits on a boar?

What’s it all about, Alfie….. I really want to know……

04.09.11